Dogs Might Fly. Welcome to Canine Airlines, this is Captain Fido speaking

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Dogs Might Fly. Welcome to Canine Airlines, this is Captain Fido speaking

March 05, 2016 - 20:26
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Over to Sky One’s deranged Dogs Might Fly where host Jamie Theakston vows: “We are going to teach a dog to fly a plane.” Why?

Jamie Theakston and rescue dogs

Over to Sky One’s deranged Dogs Might Fly where host Jamie Theakston vows: “We are going to teach a dog to fly a plane.” Why?

Apparently, renowned animal behaviour expert Mark Vette taught three hounds how to drive a car… and now he’s ready to move up to the next level.

“This is crazy difficult,” he gasped. The word “difficult” was superfluous. “I can’t even begin to think how we’re going to achieve it.” Must admit, nor can I.

Trainer Charlotte Wilde wasn’t quite so daunted. “With enough time and sausages you’d be surprised what can be achieved,” she said. I’m assuming this is a dog thing. Or do human wannabe pilots don’t require sausages as an incentive too?

Barking mad though this absurd programme undoubtedly is, it was uplifting to see the team scouring Britain’s pounds to find 12 wildly excited rescue dogs with the potential to soar high into the sky.  Who knows? They could end up working for British Airways.

Only one clever canine will make the grade. I don’t fancy wet Wilf’s chances… all he does is slosh around in water. And Essex boy Shadow, we’re told, “lacks the basic social skills”. Swears, bad table manners, doesn’t say please and thank you.

Meanwhile, Jack Russell cross Spike is too small to see out of the aircraft’s windscreen. But as the diminutive pooch’s pedigree chum Victoria Stillwell so wisely pointed out: “He could have a booster seat.” Of course. Makes perfect sense.

I have no idea what the point of all this is. Nor do I know if it’s even legal for man’s best friend to become a magnificent mutt in a flying machine. It certainly shouldn’t be.

But what the hell. It’s great to see delirious dogs having the time of their lives. Ditto the presenter who seems to be loving every minute. Good boy, Jamie!