An Impossible Job – That’s Yer Allotment Graham.

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An Impossible Job – That’s Yer Allotment Graham.

January 13, 2017 - 08:45
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Former England manager Graham Taylor passed away of a suspected heart attack on Thursday. 'An Impossible Job', a Channel Four fly on the wall documentary aired in January 1994, and followed Graham and the England team for 18 months before their failure to qualify for the World Cup.

An Impossible Job

By Phil Jones @PhilLlwynog

Former England manager Graham Taylor passed away of a suspected heart attack on Thursday. 'An Impossible Job', a Channel Four fly on the wall documentary aired in January 1994, and followed Graham and the England team for 18 months before their failure to qualify for the World Cup.

As a tribute to Graham, I thought it apt to revisit this groundbreaking classic, which astonishingly was watched by over 6 million viewers. Graham had agreed to filming, as he thought it would shine a light on the pressures of International management, and boy did it!

In many ways, this was the football equivalent of Spinal Tap, but watching the cult classic all these years later, I can’t help but think, that this was actually a very affectionate portrait by director Ken McGill. In the annals of footballing history this will be remembered for all the swearing, rants and comedy moments, but we should not forget the fatherly way Graham treated a young Paul Gascoigne, nor standing up to a yobbish England fan, that was obviously racially abusing the sublime John Barnes. “Hey, you’re talking about another human being, so watch your language”. Graham was a class act, and this was a classy documentary.

And then there were all the quotes and the laughs that made this vital viewing.

“Can we not knock it?”, “Do I not like that...”, “It's got to go, son. It's got to go big. It's got to go big!”. “Wrighty? It's made for Wrighty to come on and score, isn't it?”
“The referee's got me the sack. Thank him ever so much for that won't you?”

My favourite moment however, was when the camera seemed so uncomfortably close to Graham’s head as he howled “Hit Les, hit Les … F****’n Hell!”

The villain of the piece wasn’t Graham; it was assistant manager Lawrie McMenemy, who shirked any kind of responsibility throughout the film. Thankfully Lawrie is responsible for one of the best ever footballing quotes. I’ll just leave this here.

“The last player to score a hatrick in a cup final was Stan Mortenson. He even had a final named after him, the Matthews final”.

By the end of the documentary, and by the end of the qualifying campaign Graham hadn’t just reached the end of the road - he’d fallen off the cliff. Thankfully we have the legacy of this great documentary to look back on. Rest in peace mate, and thanks for the memories and the laughs.